Do you believe in fate/destiny?
I don’t believe in fate or destiny. I believe we make our choices and can shape our futures, particularly as we prepare for single parenting.
And I think that’s comforting. It is also less limiting. So I live intentionally like I’m playing a game of chess: observe, plan, strategize and move.
It’s best to prepare for situations before they happen. That means it’s best to prepare for single parenting before you become a single parent.
That’s not something everyone tells you. But it is a reality anyone might live. So, its best to at least mentally prepare yourself for it rather than crash into it like it was your particular fate or destiny.
Sometimes life with throw a surprise at you and that could ruin all plans. But again, when life redefines your trajectory, observe the new trajectory, plan, strategize and make your move.
Try to see the bigger picture and how you fit in it. Learn from other stories and adapt their experiences to yours. Now, define what success means to you and determine to attain it.
Observe how other single moms have failed or succeeded. It helps to think about how you might avoid their pitfalls and overcome your own challenges. Observe what roadblocks they face, how they overcome them and what you could do instead.
Plan your life over a period from immediate to long term. Plan your finances, health management, education and do same for your child(ren). Prioritise, what needs to come first and next on your plan.
As part of your plan, make a budget. How much do you need to live on and how much might you need to save? Be willing to make that money even in the most humble ways.
Strategize. Are there family and friends to pitch in or skills you may be able to monetize? Think about available free courses you can take to upskill during your free time if you need to.
Most importantly, be in emotional control of your actions. Learn to be objective and lucid before you make any major decisions. When you have reached a decision, be assertive as you communicate it.
Now you’re ready to act. Prepare for single parenting by moving on with your decisions after you have carefully considered them.
It’s not always going to be perfect, and most of us learn as we go along. But when you plan and strategize, you are better placed to take advantage of opportunities when they arise.
So please, let nothing stop you from reaching out for success. No one is destined to fail, except, I guess one who doesn’t plan.
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